Knowing (who you are) is half the battle

We are all fighting battles. Some fight on a battlefield. Others fight within themselves. But we are all searching for victories in our own wars. 

But no matter where or what you’re fighting for, it’s important to remember just how strong we can be. 

More than 20 years ago, most of my physical strength left me. My arms and legs weakened by an illness I couldn’t see and condition that seemed insurmountable. As I laid motionless in that hospital bed, surrounded by tubes and cables, I learned the true meaning of "strong."

From that moment on, the definition of strength was no longer limited to the size of your muscles. Instead, I realized true strength is measured by will and courage. Even though my body was more frail than before, my will to fight never wavered and only grew stronger. 

So every day that I’m able to greet the sun and take a breath, I fight to live life to the fullest and remember to enjoy everything it has to offer. Sadness and despair will always be present in today’s society, but if we choose to focus on good and the power of the human spirit, our lives will be better for it. 

“Strength doesn’t come from physical capacity, it comes from an indomitable will.” 

This quote from Ghandi has become my favorite since I became a person with a disability. It embodies my personal philosophy on life and provides validity to my belief on the importance of courage and perseverance. 

Now those who read this my not have intimate knowledge about the struggles of living life with a disability, but we all can relate to struggle and hardships, no matter what they may be. 

As we all continue to fight our own wars, we look for hope of winning our own personal battles. If my experiences have taught me anything, it is that we all have the power to overcome whatever we encounter. 

Whether it’s enemies on the field of battle or the inner-demons of our own devices, we must never forget the strength we have within ourselves. Knowing that you have what it takes to succeed and persevere is a victory in and of itself. 

And knowing is half the battle. 

We can be heroes

Mark and I during his hospital visit.

We all had our idols growing up. Whether it was your freshman English teacher who always challenged you to follow your dreams or your favorite baseball player who always left you in awe, idols can be all around us. 

For me, one of my most memorable idols lived on my television. 

When I became sick and spent several months in the hospital, I didn't know what my future held. I was 14-years-old and had to learn how to move my arms and breathe all over again. Seeing tomorrow quickly became my daily goal and thinking about life outside of the hospital was more dream than reality. 

While I put my education on hold, I still thought about what my life would be like after college. I had some ideas on what I wanted to do as a career, but a fateful encounter in my hospital room changed my life forever. 

During my hospital stay, I started writing about my hospital experience. I wanted to share my thoughts and insight into my life-changing ordeal and hoped it would help someone in similar circumstances. 

It didn't take long for me to develop a love for writing and at that point I knew I wanted to pursue writing as a career. Since the staff knew I enjoyed writing and had a love for sports, they decided to send a special visitor my way. 

12News' Mark Curtis. 

When I was in the rehabilitation center, Curtis was volunteering at the hospital and the staff arranged for me to meet the then sportscaster. 

To say I was excited would be an understatement. I had spent years watching him on television and the chance to meet him in person would be amazing. 

For a few moments, I wasn't a scared kid in a hospital. I was just an avid Arizona sports fan talking about my favorite teams with a new friend. Curtis and I chatted a few times before I was released and his time with me was a big reason why I pursued a career in sports journalism. 

After high school, I attended Arizona State University and earned a Bachelor's Degree in journalism. With my degree in hand, I set out to become the next great sports writer. But as life always does, it threw me a couple curve balls. 

Various job opportunities sent me into the world of marketing and social media. I enjoyed this line of work, but something always felt like it was missing. A few months ago, an opportunity crossed my path that I couldn't pass up. 

This past December, I stated my new position as Social Media Producer for 12 News. It's only been a few months, but I can safely say that this is where I was meant to be. It's an awesome feeling being able to get up and genuinely feel like you are doing what you were meant to do.

After years of trying, I've finally made it into the world of journalism. 

No, I haven't become the famous sports writer I dreamed about, but my journey is far from over. And the coolest part?

I get to work with the person who inspired me to become a journalist in the first place, Mark Curtis. When I first saw him, he was just a guy on television chatting about the Arizona Cardinals. Now he's a guy I can I can truly call a friend. 

Not many people get to say they work with their idols, and I'm privileged to be one of them. 

So what's the moral of this story?

We can all be heroes. Maybe not the kind that leaps tall buildings in a single bound, but the kind that donates their time and shows a boy that anything is possible. The kind that gives people, especially a thankful kid,  the inspiration to never give up and fight for your dreams, no matter what. 

Losing Touch

I can't believe it's been more than 16 years since I took my "last" steps. At this point, it seems like my life has been split in two: one half as an able-bodied person, and the other as a quadriplegic. There's not a moment that goes by that I don't think about what it was like as a kid. 

Whether it was playing carpet hockey with my brother in the middle of our living room or hanging out with my friends at school, my thoughts are always filled with my childhood experiences. But as the years have past, I've found myself losing more than just the ability to move my arms and legs. Even though I can reminisce about my past, I seem to be forgetting what it feels like to have the ability to move. 

It's an odd feeling to forget what it feels like to walk down the street, play around with friends or even the simple act of holding someone's hand. I know that I experienced all these sensations, but since they've left my life long ago, so have their memories. Not knowing or remembering these feelings is certainly a scary notion. My arms and legs may be broken, but I never expected my memories to go as well. 

While my memories have not fully faded, I will continue to cherish those that are still with me. We have all heard that we never really miss anything until it's gone, and now I have experienced that sentiment first hand. Now that I can no longer use my arms and legs like I used to, I realize just how much I miss it. I often find myself thinking about my past and look back on it with appreciation. While I've lost the ability to walk, I was able to be able-bodied for 14 wonderful years, and I will always be grateful for that. 

Even though I may be losing touch with my past, I will never lose touch of who I was and who I am. I may be losing the feeling of what it was like to walk, but I will never lose hope. No one can say for certain if I will ever walk again, but as long as I can hold on to my memories of the past, I will never give up. It may be difficult to remember what it was like as a kid, but I will fight to hang on to my memories and my optimism as long as I can. 

30 Lessons I've Learned Over My 30 Years

It's been a crazy adventure over the past 30 years of my life. I've been through numerous trials and tribulations, but I can certainly say that my life has been mostly half full. From growing up in the bustling Arizona suburb of Ahwatukee to fighting for my life during my eight-month hospital stay, there have been plenty of experiences that taught me how to live life to the fullest. Here are 30 lessons I've learned during my brief 30 years on this earth. 

• Don't sweat the small stuff. It's a little cliche, but definitely true. 
• Patience is most certainly a virtue. Know when to just stop, take a breath, and relax. 
• It's okay to ask for help sometimes, we all could use a hand with something. 
• Casa Reynoso makes the best Mexican food in Arizona. 
• Just because a personal aide is attractive, it doesn't make them reliable. You know who you are. 
• It doesn't do you any good to look for someone to blame. 
• Feeling sorry for yourself isn't worth it. 
• You can always make the best out of any bad situation. 
• Being in a hospital for eight months qualifies you for a health credit in high school. 
• Athletes come in many forms. They even drive electric wheelchairs. 
• Strength isn't measured by a person's physical capacity. 
• Portable ramps will always be your best friend. 
• Don't freak out when you get locked in a van. There's a locksmith around somewhere. 
• You'd be surprised at the logistics involved in giving a lap dance to a guy in a wheelchair. 
• If you need someone to look up to, sit down. 
• New Girl is the best show on T.V. and scary relatable to my life.
• Ironside was cancelled after three episodes because they cast Blair Underwood instead of me.
• The airline industry is the arch-nemesis of people with disabilities.
• If you have to spend eight months in the hospital, make sure there is a Whataburger across the street.
• It’s okay to have bad days. But that doesn’t mean you have to have a bad attitude.
• Experience everything you can.
• Don’t judge a book by its cover, or a person by their disability.
• A sense of humor can get you through any situation.
• Make time to thank those who’ve helped you along your journey.
• Learning to breathe is harder the second time around.
• Enjoy your high school and college years, they’ll be some of the best years of your life.
• Always make time for your friends.
• Growing up is mandatory, growing old is optional.
• If you can’t do what you love, love what you do.
• Never give up, never stop fighting.

The past 30 years have been quite a ride and I can’t wait to see what the next 30 hold. I don’t know what my future holds, but I do know that I will continue to live the best I can and enjoy life as much as possible.