I became a quad 25 years ago. Here’s what my disability taught me.
It’s the 25th anniversary of the day I became a quadriplegic. Here are some of the lessons I learned after I became a person with a disability.
It happened 25 years ago and I remember it like it was yesterday. I was 14 years old and fighting a cold. But on the early morning of Sept. 12, 1997, I stumbled out of my bed and into my parents’ room.
“I can’t breathe, I need to go to the ER,” I murmured.
My dad jumped out of bed and raced me down to the emergency room.
After being airlifted to a second hospital, I fell into a coma. Four days later, I awoke without the ability to move my arms and legs.
My life as a shy, quiet freshman in high school was no more. I was now a quadriplegic and scared out of my mind.
I would spend the next eight months in the hospital adjusting to my new life in a wheelchair. For the next 25 years, I navigated the highs and lows of being a person with a disability. I have learned a lot about myself and the world around me. Here are a few of the things I found:
Patience is my superpower: When you rely on others for virtually every aspect of your life, you quickly develop a deep sense of patience. Whether it’s waiting for your strength to return or someone to change the channel on your TV, it has come in handy more often than you think.
Never ever lose hope: It’s been two decades since I took my last steps, but I still try to move my arms and legs every morning when I wake up. Yes, my arms may never lift from my mattress, but that won’t keep me from trying.
Success and happiness are a group effort: As much as I have accomplished over the past two decades, I couldn’t achieve any of it without my incredible family and friends. Their help has been invaluable and I will never be able to find enough words to thank them.
Disability is not a death sentence: For years, having a disability has held a negative stigma. Being disabled meant you couldn’t have a fulfilling life or be happy. After being a wheelchair user for 25 years, I can safely say that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sure, having a disability isn’t ideal, but it doesn’t immediately mean your life isn’t worth living.
My life has taken plenty of twists and turns since I became a quadriplegic. I met some incredible people, saw some fantastic places and built a successful career. My disability has given me a valuable perspective for which I am forever grateful. 25 years have come and gone and I have learned so much. Here’s to hoping the next 25 years will lead to even more knowledge and growth.
Don't let fear drive away your hope
September has been a strange month for me over the past few decades. Along with the significance of the 9/11 attacks in 2001, the day after also holds a special meaning for me. On Sept. 12, 1997, I became a quadriplegic and lost the ability to use my arms and legs.
Each September years after that fateful illness brought a wide range of emotions, but this year, one emotion stood out more than most. Fear.
As I look back on my experience with my illness, Hopkins Syndrome, I vividly remember how I felt initially as I woke from my coma in the intensive care unit at Phoenix Children’s Hospital. Once I gained my bearings, I could feel the fear wash over me. I was covered in tubes as I.V. bags and monitors towered over my bedside. I was a scared 14-year-old boy stuck in a life-changing moment.
September has been a strange month for me over the past few decades. Along with the significance of the 9/11 attacks in 2001, the day after also holds a special meaning for me. On Sept. 12, 1997, I became a quadriplegic and lost the ability to use my arms and legs.
Each September years after that fateful illness brought a wide range of emotions, but this year, one emotion stood out more than most. Fear.
As I look back on my experience with my illness, Hopkins Syndrome, I vividly remember how I felt initially as I woke from my coma in the intensive care unit at Phoenix Children’s Hospital. Once I gained my bearings, I could feel the fear wash over me. I was covered in tubes as I.V. bags and monitors towered over my bedside. I was a scared 14-year-old boy stuck in a life-changing moment.
At the time, I was just trying to survive. Determining how the rest of my life would turn out was pretty low on my to-do list. It’s completely understandable for me to be afraid and fearful about what was happening. My life was changing right before me.
But as the days turned to weeks, and weeks into months, the fear slowly receded. With each physical therapy session and child life appointment, I began to understand my new reality and adjust to my life as a person with a disability.
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Now don’t get me wrong, 23 years later the fear is still very much there. But it’s not driving me away from my hope for a great life.
I may be scared of not being able to accomplish or experience all I wanted in life, but I’m hopeful of what my future holds. Uncertainty feeds my fear of what could be, but unwavering optimism strengthens my resolve to live life to the best of my abilities, even if I can’t move my arms and legs.
In today’s world, fear seems to be unending at times. From the coronavirus to the current political landscape, there’s a wide supply of things to be afraid of. But just as I have learned over the years, I wish those reading this will continue to find strength in their own hope and not let their fears overcome their ability to find happiness.
No matter how big or small.
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22 years later: My strength may fade, but my hope never will
It’s that time of year. The month of September always brings around mixed feelings for me. Sept. 12, 2019 marks the 22nd anniversary of the day I became a quadriplegic.
I can’t believe it’s been over two decades since I lost my ability to move my arms and legs. It seems like yesterday when I was in the intensive care unit clinging to life. Looking back year after year, it is amazing to think about how I overcame such insurmountable odds. And while that was 22 years ago, my childhood is even farther away.
It’s that time of year. The month of September always brings around mixed feelings for me. Sept. 12, 2019 marks the 22nd anniversary of the day I became a quadriplegic.
I can’t believe it’s been over two decades since I lost my ability to move my arms and legs. It seems like yesterday when I was in the intensive care unit clinging to life. Looking back year after year, it is amazing to think about how I overcame such insurmountable odds. And while that was 22 years ago, my childhood is even farther away.
My life before I became sick seems like it was so long ago. One thing that always scares me is losing my memories from my childhood.
Not the actual memories of past moments, the sensory memories of my childhood. The feeling of the grass on the soccer field. The anxiety and thrill of attending a friends party. Or just simply walking around outside.
I know I had the ability to move around, but as the years go by, it’s harder and harder to remember what it was like to be “normal.”
As the years go by, I’ll continue to look back on my journey over the last two decades and reflect on all I have accomplished. While I may never walk again, my hope to regain my strength will never falter and I will continue to roll wherever life takes me in the meantime.
My 15th Anniversary
Here's to the next 15 years...
Today is the 15th anniversary of the day I became a quadriplegic. Even though my body may be weak, I believe my illness has made me a stronger person. It's a weird feeling to realize that I've now spent more time in a wheelchair than being able-bodied. For all the good and bad, it's been a crazy and exciting 15 years. Even though this isn't the way I planned my first 29 years to go, I'm determined to live life on my own terms.
Here's to the next 15 years...
Happy Anniversary...
September 12 is a bittersweet day for me. Exactly 12 years ago today marks the last day of my “normal” life. It was the day I said goodbye to the life I loved and mistakenly took for granted. It was the day I lost my innocence and childhood.
It was the day I became a quadriplegic.
Every September 12, I go through a myriad of emotions; sadness, anger, confusion, happiness, appreciation, and determination. I am saddened because of all the things I have lost; experiences, time, abilities, and old friends. But I am appreciative of what I still have; family, new friends, health, courage, and determination.
I don’t ever get depressed as my anniversary approaches each year. I simply just reflect back on what I’ve been through and accept who I am and what has happened. It was a tragic event and my life was drastically changed because of it.
But it wasn’t going to change how I lived my life.
I am fortunate enough to have battled depression about my situation, and most people are surprised to hear that. I guess it is common place for people in my situation to go through bouts of depression. I don’t really know what to tell people when they ask how I’ve been able to keep such a positive attitude.
I just like to think that if I have to use so much time and energy on being sad and reclusive, why don’t I just use that same time and energy on staying positive and extroverted? Yes, there are times when I feel bad, but I don’t let it rule how I feel.
So today, I simply look back and remember with appreciation and acceptance. While I have said goodbye to the past and lost many things because of my illness, I say hello to my future and have found a new outlook on life.
One of hope, courage and perseverance.