We Did It!
I just wanted to thank everyone for becoming fans of my blog's facebook page and putting me over the 100-fan mark! Hopefully the page will help raise interest in my blog/site. For those who are interested, my facebook URL for the blog is facebook.com/DisabledDevilonWheels.
Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?
If someone walked up to you and said they’re 26-years-old and still live with their parents, what would be your first impression of that person?
Yeah, me too.
Normally, when someone thinks about a person like this, the first thing that comes to mind is a Jack-Black type (minus the fame, fortune, and cool personality) with a basement full of toys, a part-time job at a video game store and a severe shyness. They often times find themselves at home because of financial or social reasons. And while I have my fair share of “action figures” and social awkwardness, I am still at home for different reasons.
Since I became a quadriplegic, the idea of someday having a place of my own seemed more like a fantasy than reality. Because of my condition, I require full assistance for literally all everyday activities. So, the thought of being somewhere on my own didn’t seem to be possible.
Currently, my parents help me with pretty much everything, and without their help, I wouldn’t be here today. They have given me so much and I don’t know how I can ever repay them. But sometimes, I feel that my condition is a burden on my family and I don’t ever want them to feel like they are responsible for my well-being.
Our family dynamic would also make moving into a place of my own a very hard decision. We are a very close family and spend a lot of time together. From dinner at our grandparent’s house, to movie nights with my cousins, spending time with my family is very important to me. My grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins al live within 10 minutes of my house.
I also just want to say that me wanting to get a place of my own is not an indictment of my current living situation. I live in a great home and couldn’t ask for anything better. I just feel that while I’m at home, I can’t move on to the next chapter of my adult life.
Sometimes, I get embarrassed when I have to tell people that I still live with my parents. Granted, I’m sure they understand the reason, but it is still a little embarrassing none the less. I’m a college graduate with a great, full-time job and a good head on my shoulders. Any one else like me would have a place of there own by now; even if it is just a small, one-bedroom apartment.
I don’t want a mansion (yet), just a small place that I can call my own. A place where I can hang out with friends, have parties (maybe all nighters) and even maybe bring a date to (if I ever get one). I know that my condition will not allow me some of the same luxuries experienced by my able-bodied brethren, but I think I can make it work.
For now, I’ll continue thinking about how I can make it work and imagine what my future bachelor pad will look like.
My Dating Game
As I was clicking through my facebook page the other day, one thing in particular caught my eye. I noticed that a few of my friends changed their status from “single” to “in a relationship.” Once I saw this surprising trend, it got me thinking of my own personal life, or severe lack thereof.
From first through eighth grade, I was not unaccustomed to grabbing the attention of the ladies in my class. Whether it was Michelle dropping off a get well card at my house in fourth grade, or Stephanie giving me my first kiss in seventh grade, girls weren’t far from my side. And with all my “success” during my early years, I eagerly anticipated the boundless possibilities that awaited me in high school.
But after I became a quad during my freshman year of high school, everything changed.
While I still had girls at my side, they were my nurse instead of interested coeds. And if a girl did manage to speak to me, it seemed like they were talking to me out of pity and curiosity. Even though I didn’t agree with their reasons to speak to me, I was in no position to turn away a conversation, no matter what the reason.
As I made my way through high school and college, I felt like a spectator in my own life. I so badly wanted to speak to girls, but my courage was in short supply. But with my relative inexperience with girls, I did manage to forge a few friendships with girls.
But friendships were all I could muster (Ryan Reynolds I feel your pain).
I guess the mere sight of a wheelchair would throw me into the “Friend Zone” for any girl. I can’t believe that they didn’t know that nothing says sexy more than Scoliosis and Muscle Atrophy. While I often used my chair and illness as an excuse, I’m not completely without blame either.
The main reason is because whenever I would see a girl that I was interested in, my head flooded with questions.
- What do I say?
- How do I take her on a date?
- Who can take me on the date?
- Will my parents have to drop me off?
- Will she mind feeding me?
I often couldn’t find the answer to these questions and decided that it isn’t worth the embarrassment, so I never did anything but watch her pass by and wonder. I worried too much about my “accommodations” and disabilities and sabotaged my chances before even trying. It was my own self-doubt that seems to be the biggest hurdle.
Every time I watched a romantic comedy (and yes, it is more often than you think), I sat in envy. I so badly wanted to experience what it was like to have a girlfriend. Not just for those romantic, sensual moments, but for those moments that seem to be overlooked at times.
You know, those moments where you cuddle with each other on the couch to watch TV, talk all night in bed about nothing and everything or just walk silently down the sidewalk, enjoying each other’s company. These are the moments I wished to experience, but felt I would never get the chance.
As I look back and think about everything that has happened, I realized that I have to stop being a spectator and get in the game. I may never be able to do the chivalrous things like pull out her chair, stand up when she leaves the table or hold open a door, but I can still be that perfect boyfriend. All it takes is one chance.
Sometimes, it seems like my dating game is unwinnable. But like they say, you can’t win if you don’t play.
EP Award Ceremony at the Diamondbacks Game
Here is a clip of the ceremony at the baseball game. It was a great night and thanks to everyone who helped put it together! Check out my flickr page for pics as well.
And the Award Goes to... Me!
I don’t know how to tell you this, but I’m kind of a big deal. Ron Burgundy quote aside, I actually do have some great news.
I was nominated and picked to be this year’s recipient of the Maxwell J. Schleifer Distinguished Service Award. Created by Exceptional Parent magazine and sponsored by CVS Pharmacies, this award honors an individual who shows exemplary service and advocacy for people with disabilities. And because of my work with Phoenix Children’s Hospital, Mesa Disabled Sports and other various organizations, members of the PCH Foundation thought I would be the perfect candidate.
On June 9, members from CVS and EP Magazine will present me with the award during an on-field, pre-game ceremony at the Arizona Diamondbacks game against the Giants. CVS will also present a check to PCH in my honor.
If you are in town, please head out to the ballpark and support this great achievement. Check back after June 9, for pics from the game.
Nathan Fillion as the Green Lantern
You've got my vote; he would be an awesome Green Lantern. What are Warner Bros. and DC waiting for!
Heaven is Easier to get into than Arizona State!
As President Obama prepares to give his commencement speech at ASU, The Daily Show came down to Tempe to figure out why Obama won't receive an Honorary Degree. Classic! I have never been more proud to be an ASU Alumni (Please note my not so subtle sarcasm). Go Devils!
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | M - Th 11p / 10c | |||
| Arizona State Snubs Obama | ||||
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'09 Arizona Heat Golf Tourney is a Hit!
It is that time of year again, you know, the time of hot temps, shorts and movie blockbusters. And of course, golf tournaments.
On May 9, my power soccer team, the Arizona Heat, held our 4th Annual Benefit Golf Tournament the Links at Queen Creek Golf Course. Over 50 golfers made their way out to the East Valley to support the Heat squad as we prepare for the trip to the National Tournament in Fishers, IN this June
While the temperatures flirted with 100 degrees, it was still a great day to tee it up on the course. During the tourney, I made my way out to Hole 5 to converse with the golfers as they teed off. I was also joined by friends and family who volunteered to sell raffle tickets for the closest to the pin contest.
We cheered on the golfers as they tried their luck at a chance to land their ball in the 10-foot diameter circle on the green. It wasn’t the 16th hole at the TPC, but it was still fun.
After the tournament, the golfers and volunteers were treated to lunch as we presented prizes to the 1st and 2nd place foursomes and held the raffle. As the golfers enjoyed the barbeque, several members of the Arizona Heat made it out to show their thanks to everyone in attendance.
All in all, the tournament was once again a huge success. Thanks again to all the volunteers and people who made this event possible. We raised more than $3,500 and it will go towards funding our trip to the National Tournament.
Stay tuned for info on next year’s tournament.
Highlights from '09 Western Regionals
It's a bit late, but here are some highlights from the tournament this past March in San Jose, CA.
'09 Western Regional Power Soccer Highlights from Gabe Trujillo on Vimeo.
God Didn't Want Me to See Hugh Jackman
I’m sure most of you know by now that Tempe, Arizona won an online contest to have the World Premiere here in the Valley. And, of course, me being the autograph hound that I am, I didn’t want to pass up this opportunity. Besides, how often do you get to attend an actual movie premiere?
I’m sure most of you know by now that Tempe, Arizona won an online contest to have the World Premiere here in the Valley. And, of course, me being the autograph hound that I am, I didn’t want to pass up this opportunity. Besides, how often do you get to attend an actual movie premiere?
Me and my broke down chair.
So as soon as I heard we won, I began my quest for tickets to the premiere. Feverishly, I scoured through Facebook, MySpace, and any other social networks looking for people who had extra tickets. Finally, at the eleventh hour, I came across one ticket.
Since I’m in my electric wheelchair, I normally would need someone to go with me. But since this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, I was going to tough it out and go on my own.
When the day of the premiere arrived, to say I was excited would be an under statement. I couldn’t wait to head over to Tempe Marketplace and watch the festivities. I invited my aunt to go with me in hopes we could find another ticket or maybe the Harkins people would be nice enough to let her in.
And so my wacky adventure begins…
As my aunt and I arrived at the Cine Capri in Tempe Marketplace, we were greeted by a mob of fans eagerly waiting the cast’s arrival. Once I rolled out of my van I jetted to the check in table. I went to sign in and asked if there was any way my aunt could attend the movie with me. If she couldn’t, I asked if she could at least escort me in to make sure I got in okay.
But before I could even finish asking my question, policy started regurgitating out of the Harkins’ employee’s mouth.
“I’m sorry, but you can’t get into the building without a wristband and a ticket.” He stated. “Once you get in the building, no one can leave until the event is over. There’s nothing we can do.”
Strike one. I would have been better talking to a T-1000 because this guy clearly had no heart strings to be plucked and was just focused on his mission at hand: sign-ins. Well, on to the next obstacle.
If you were one of the lucky ones who had a ticket, you were given a wristband that got you access to a special section that was close to the stage where the actors were speaking. I had a wristband, but my aunt did not. There in lied our conundrum.
My aunt and I made our way to the special section to see if both of us could get in. And wouldn’t you know, more policy vomit.
“I’m sorry, she [my aunt] can’t enter without a wristband, I can’t help you,” Said the security guard. “Only you can go in.”
I even told her that I normally have an attendant with me in case something happened, but she still refused to help. Strike two. And low and behold, something bad actually happened.I'm glad someone had a good time.
Since my aunt could not go in, I decided to go in myself while my aunt watched from the “free” section.With my new plan finalized, I rolled back to the special section. As I made it to the entrance, there was one more bump in the road. And it literally was a bump in the road.
The stage was setup in the parking lot, and to get through to the special section I had to go over a cover of wires on the ground. Ironically enough, it was in front of the disabled parking space. So I rolled to the section and over the bump.
Then everything literally fell apart.
As I rolled over the bump, my chair made a weird sound and started to act strange. I rolled around to get a better view when suddenly my chair died and would just turn in circles. I was freaking out because my aunt wasn’t with me and I couldn’t get a hold of her.
Luckily, I managed to ask a lady standing next to me to help me call my aunt (thank you so much by the way). But when my aunt went to the entrance, they wouldn’t even let her in. She repeatedly told them that she was just trying to get me because my chair broke down and she needed to push me out. But as usual, they kept spewing out policy and wouldn’t budge. I got a call from her if you minutes later to let me know that she couldn’t get in, so I had to find a new plan.
I asked the lady that was helping me to see if she can find someone that could help. After she wandered around the crowd for a few moments, she returned to me and said she got a hold of an EMT and said they would come help me get to my aunt. After a few moments a couple EMTs came over and helped push me out of the section.
With an EMT pushing my chair back towards my aunt, I made my way out of the special section. Once I returned to my aunt’s side, we tried to come up with my next plan of action.
As my aunt and I try to figure out a way to get me into the movie theater, an opportunity came knocking, or rather, walking by. While I sat defeated in my broke down wheelchair, a group of executives from Harkins theaters came strolling by. Once you realize who they were, my aunt quickly got their attention and informed them of my unfortunate situation.
They seemed a little dumbfounded and surprised by what had happened. But one of them gave me their business card and said to e-mail them and they could see if they could get me premiere tickets for the Thursday premiere of the movie [UPDATE:After all this happened, I e-mailed the said executive, who shall remain nameless, and they never returned my e-mail. Surprise, surprise.].
Even though I could not move the chair in my own, I was determined to try and find a way to get into the movie theater. So if one final attempt, I headed back towards the theater. Once we arrived in the front, we went to find someone who worked at the theater and asked if there was somebody that could help push me into the theater since my wheelchair broke.
But of course, they wanted nothing to do with me.
They told me that since this was such a big event, that they did not have enough staff to help me into the movie theater. Yes, you heard right, they were too busy to help someone who was disabled. A task that would take all of 10 minutes would be too much of a hindrance for them. They even went on to say that since I couldn’t move the chair myself, that it would be a danger to me and the people in the theater if an emergency happened because I wouldn’t be able to get out. Yeah, that makes perfect sense.
Strike three, I’m out. In the mean it was supposed to be filled with fun and excitement, turned into a night filled with anger, sadness and disappointment. I at least stayed to watch the actors go on stage and give a little speech, but I was nowhere near as close if I were able to be in the ticket section.
While it was disappointing to see that some people would rather just ignore me and then try to help, the thing that really irks me is that during the week before I had a really bad cold and I was unsure if I would even be able to go to the premiere. But once I got there, my cold seemed to get better and I didn’t have any issues with it at all, but suddenly, my chair broke down and I couldn’t even go. If it wasn’t one thing it’s another. If I was going to miss the event, I would’ve thought it would have been because of my cold. But it turned out that my chair would be the culprit.
I guess God really didn’t want me to see Hugh Jackman.